Legacy LD5

Well, I really need to stop buying video games, 'cause they're all just donkey shit these days, but considering "Turok" for the PC uses Unreal Engine 3 and I think UT3 came out fairly good, I decided to pick it up. Well, it's got the annoying, "Look, you have a team-mate" bullshit that I so wish I could just kill, and of course you do have to kill most of the dinos you come across, but the dinos are done probably the best in any game I've seen so far. They have some nice behavior movements (and the tinier they are, the cuter they are), and although they're not featured in the game enough, they are out when you're outside, and the T. rex's are nice and big. When you do kill them, they have nice animations as well.

However, as with all games, there's still much to be desired...but at least it's funny! I could just watch the dinos interact amongst themselves instead of playing the damn game. The T. rex apparently has some stinky breath, because the funniest thing I've seen so far is a weesaur, and a T. rex, and the T. rex just kinda walked over to the parasaur, and nudged it a bit, and then gave it a quick roar at point blank range -- and the weesaur just fell over and died! Wow, I really need to see if I can get a video of that, 'cause it's just hilarious. Of course, there are better interactions, and nice to see the T. rex eatin' the raptors, but still...wow, a killer roar, that was just too funny.

*Bites Turok's head off and tramples his body to splintered mush*

However, I approve of a killer roar attack.

*Rumbles thoughtfully...*

I wrote a game guide on the PS3 version of Turok for one of our print magazines. It looks damn nice. It has plenty of firepower. It has soldiers with balls so big it is a wonder they are walking instead of rolling through the landscape. It has some of the fiercest raptors (a few of them looking alarmingly like me) in the history of gaming and a grossly oversized Rex. Not that this would be a bad thing...

What really pissed me off were the controls and the health layout.
Seriously, even though I have been working as a video game journalist for eight years, I must somehow have missed that decisive moment in time at which the health bar stopped being one of the cool kids. When was the last time I saw a health bar in a shooter? Turok 3? I especially love the argumentation that warrants its goodbye: "It is too unrealistic." ... So instead I get Mr. Machismo who, proudly carrying his arsenal, gets his lower half ripped off by a grenade and heals up by leaning against a nearby tree for ten seconds? Mmmhmmm... That is kind of like with the unemployed alcoholic GO LOCAL SPORTS guy I tend to see bumming in the city, singing, already piss drunk at 10 AM after his favorite soccer team won the game the day before, trying to convince me that "THAAAAT'S HOOOOW WIIIIINNERSSSS LOOOOK!", proudly wearing sandals, white socks and a filthy wifebeater - I'm just not buying it.

And the controls. Good GAWD the controls. Newsflash, Disney: Most consoles are played with controllers. Reasearching that shouldn't be hard, since it has never been differently since the NES. Besides being the only lovestick most Xbox frat boys will ever have in their hands, they also have another important feature: They suck at precise aiming compared to keyboard & mouse. That is why, also ever since the NES, you either have an auto aiming system or an adaptive steering sensitivity to aid your aiming on consoles. In Turok, you better pick up a minigun, because you NEED to fire off 50 shots to make sure a single one actually, by pure random chance, hits what you want.

But it has dinosaurs. And an awesome landscape design. So I guess as long as you have a herp or a herb fetish, it is all good.

At least I just finished betatesting and reviewing another dinosaur game that I had a damn lot of fun with and that I expect to release any time soon now.

* L I C K s whity demonrappy *
and keeps still chuckling at the herp and herb fetish

I may be showing my ignorance but what's a herb or herp fetish?

  herp:
  herb:

( * makes hilarious RAWR sounds to the croc and chirp-chirp-chirp cricket / garden sounds to the herbs * )

So herps are scalies or herps are crocodiles? And herbs refers to all plant-life in general?

herp = all things reptile
herb = all things plant that you find in the kitchen or the pharmacy

@ Ahastar

Wow, I thought they stopped making the Turok series... apparently not. I remember the first turok game I played was Turok 2: Seeds of Evil ofor the N64... I think I have that one sitting and collecting dust somewhere along with Turok 3.